Thursday, August 25, 2011
August 25 - International Murder Fantasy Football Owners Day
Any person that plays Fantasy Football either over the internet or in a week to week paper type game is called an owner. They make all the decisions about who will start each week and the dreaded who to bench decision.
The ones that really suffer though are the spouses. After Fantasy Football Cram day, they have had a glimpse into how there weekends for the next 4 months or so are going to be spent. The ones that also have husbands or wives that are college football fans as well sometimes slip into depression at the sound of Lee Corso's voice.
Well, to remedy that situation, I offer you a tip. Get your cell phone and call the house phone. Your spouse will not reach for the phone, they will still be preparing for the draft. Answer it, pretend to talk then call out "Honey, Bill Parcells is on the phone." When your significant other hops up to run to the phone, bash them over the head with the top to there mini tailgating grill. You may have to bash them a few times, but the exercise maybe worth it. Staging it to look like an accident is your job.